Consensual Slavery as a Spiritual practice

I came across this article a few days ago

'Fifty Shades of Grey' promotes violence against women, study says

I will let you decide if you agree with this article, but I wanted to say something about this lifestyle and abuse.

Living a 24x7 master/slave lifestyle has worked wonders for my sex life and has brought sparkle and pizzazz into my married life. I would not trade it for anything in this world.

Having said that, being a slave is not just about sexual gratification for me. It also feeds my spiritual needs. How?

Well, if you care about being a good person, you soon realize as I have, that anger, pride, selfishness and ego often get in the way. I have struggled with all of these at one time or another in my life

One way to become a better person we are told by many religions is to follow the moral precepts laid out in religious books. However every time I read a book or ask somebody else to interpret its teachings for me, it is my mind with its ego, pride, anger and selfishness that interprets what I hear and guides me on what "it" thinks I should follow and what I should ignore. I could think that the grace of God is upon me and somehow allows me to interpret what I read or hear correctly, but how am I to know that this is not just my hubris speaking?

I could listen to some guru or pastor or preacher or Imam and do what they tell me I should do, but unless you can trust them completely, this could be quite dangerous. I can cite numerous examples where people in this category have abused the trust their followers placed in them.

I could do what my Swami does. He practices mindfulness meditation and this has raised his consciousness. I have tried this, but I get distracted so easily. Meditation is difficult for me. There I said it Swami!, please don't hate me for it :-)

I know this is going to sound a little crazy, but for me surrendering my will into the hands of my Swami and doing whatever he tells me, really reduces the presence of ego, pride, selfishness and anger in my actions. Being a Consensual Slave or Daasi has raised my consciousness and made me a better human being. The act of obeying and submitting has let me become aware of my pride, my selfishness etc but my actions which are dictated by his wishes are divorced from them. Because I just do what he wishes, my ego is not involved in my life as much.

Obviously my dynamic is somewhat unique. I am married to my Swami, and he has my complete trust. You can't do this with someone who does not have your back. Otherwise it can be like following a demagogue or charlatan and I admit it can become very abusive.

Having said that, it is entirely possible that to somebody looking at my relationship with my Swami from outside, it will appear abusive even though my slavery is completely consensual. For them, a woman submitting to her husband and obeying him is anachronistic and abusive even if it is consensual. They may believe that he has brain washed me but they can't possibly know how I feel inside. What I trying to say is that, just because a relationship appears abusive at first glance, it does not mean it is!! and conversely just because a relationship appears to conform to "current acceptable norms" does not mean it is effective or even beneficial.

 I am thankful that he has stepped into this "Swami" role for my sake. In my mind, being a consensual slave is much easier than being a responsible Master. I just have to follow his lead. He however has a tougher role. As I heard in a Spider-man movie "With great power, comes great responsibility". He is acutely aware that as his slave or Daasi, I am extremely vulnerable and this puts enormous stress on him to fulfill his responsibilities as a Master. Poor Swami, sometimes I sense how hard it is on him. This is not a walk in the park for him and certainly not a power grab. Being my God is not an easy job!

He is so good at it though!

Thank you Swami, both Chutki and I appreciate it very much. Lots of hugs and kisses to you. You are fulfilling a deep emotional need in both of us and I can say for certain that there is no abuse here no matter what psychologists at Michigan State University and Ohio State University say :-)