Daasi Yoga!

When you are married, raising a family and working, sometimes the daily routine of your life can make you forget about this special covenant you have established with your spouse.

My Swami has an easier time being aware that he is Swami because he meditates a lot and has developed this keen sense of being aware of the present moment. He rarely does things on auto pilot and focuses on what he does intensely. He projects his "inner Swami" naturally even when he is grocery shopping or working in the yard, or plays with our daughter.

Sitting in Meditation is harder for me, but my Swami told me that the act of Mediation can be practiced in almost any activity that we do, to bring about better awareness. So he worked with me to modify an activity that I already do daily so that I can keep my mind aware of my Daasi status easily.

I sleep naked in our bed, as per our contract. Sleeping naked in bed, when my Swami is fully clothed  reinforces my relationship with him beautifully. I feel so feminine, vulnerable and every time he caresses me I feel so loved. But before I get into bed, I kiss my Swami's feet and do this fifteen minute routine. I begin with a prayer and then walk thru each of my marriage vows and assume a set of poses to remind myself of their significance. I stay in the pose for a minute, mentally aware of how that pose is connected to my vow. I try to do this in the dark, to remind myself that even if nobody is watching me, I will stay true to these vows

My Vows

• Treat him as my God

 See my post on the God reference. I get down on my knees, rest my butt on my heels and bend forward till my stomach rests on my thighs. Then I straighten my arms in front of my body, and make sure my forehead and palms touch the ground.  I see him as my God in my mind's eye and let that fact invade my consciousness. 

• Always trust and have faith in my Swami

My Swami has this in his vows as well. I always kid him that his faith in me is stronger than my faith in him!! I remain kneeling, but spread my legs wider, rest my butt on my heels, arch my back, close my eyes and rest my hands on my thighs palms facing outward. My palms are open because I am telling myself that I should trust him and accept his guidance without complain or negativity

• Respect my Swami

This is a big one for me, but it is equally important for my Swami as well. He believes that I complete him as a person and feels that disrespecting me is like disrespecting himself. The only exception to this vow is when he pretends to humiliate me during sexual play. I remain kneeling, bow my head and bring my palms together in front of me. I make sure my arms are parallel to the ground. This puts subtle pressure on my wrists, and is symbolic of being respectful to him even in challenging circumstances

• Obey and Submit to him

You would not expect this, but ironically my Swami obeys and submits to me as well "in certain areas of our life". If I request he come to the temple with me, he does, I am the dominant one in the kitchen. I decide everything there. I also make most of the important decisions for our daughter. I am also our social director!  I remain kneeling, lock my arms behind my back but keep it parallel to the ground, tilt my head slightly and open my eyes and imagine I am looking into my Swami's eyes as he stands over me. My arms are locked to make myself aware that obedience and submission go hand in hand and I am submitting to my Swami only if I obey him at all times. Of Course, kneeling reinforces his dominance over me and tilting my head and gazing at him shows reverence and humility

• Be Truthful and honest with him

This is also in my Swami's vows. Developing faith depends on it and we are truthful and honest with each other. You can be honest without hurting the other person. My Swami has taught me this. I get back to my first pose, but instead of having my arms in the front, bring them to my side with palms facing upward. and rest my forehead on the ground. This is also called the "Infant's pose" in Yoga. Taking this pose makes me intensely aware that like an infant I must always be truthful and honest and never practice deception on my Swami

• Put his needs before mine

The best part of being a Daasi is serving my Swami. Serving him with my body, my mind and my soul. This is a big part of who I am. Even with others who are not my Swami, I enjoy taking care of people. It feeds my femininity. This is slightly modified "downward dog" pose in Yoga. I rise up slowly from my previous pose, keep my hands on the ground slightly ahead of my shoulders and make sure my knees are under my hips. I then lift my knees off the ground and straighten my legs making an inverted V position with my body. I push way up through my tailbone. I allow my heels to reach for the ground. I then try to spread my feet a lot wider than my hips. I keep my shoulders wide and back and away from the ears. I move my breasts down as if reaching for my thighs. I try and lift my butt as high as I can. I love this position. It stretches me out really well and since I am naked, wow! it really makes me aware of how easily my Swami can use my body if he were standing behind me. 

• Accept my Swami for who he is and be thankful for his presence in my life

This is also in my Swami's vows. We don't try to change each other. He accepts me for who I am and I him. I kneel, bow my head, keep my back straight, bend my arms, let my elbows touch my tummy, face my palms upwards and cup them. I cup my palms to signify my willingness to accept  him as he is and I bow my head to signify that I am thankful for his presence in my life

• Ask for forgiveness for my mistakes

Ego's really hurt marriages, so both my Swami and I have this in our vows. We always ask for each other's forgiveness for our transgressions. I keep kneeling but move my body forward, till I am resting on my elbows, I place my lower arms flat on the ground and bring my palms together. Then I move my knees really wide and open up my  hips. I make sure my inner ankles touch the ground but the heels are away from each other and are not close to one another. i arch my back and look straight ahead. This really stretches me and reminds me that even if it is uncomfortable, I must acknowledge that I have transgressed and must seek forgiveness

• Be Loyal and Patient with my Swami

If you want to be in my good books, you better be in my Swami's good books. I take this one very seriously. I don't tolerate anybody who disrespects him. As a rational person, my Swami felt he can never be blindly loyal to me, but as an emotional person, I have this urge to be blindly loyal to him. So instead of changing who we are, we each practice loyalty in our own way. As for patience, my mother always taught me that as a woman, it helps us to exhibit more patience. I think I have had an entire life of training here! I stand on my left leg, rest the heel and balls of my right feet on my inner left thigh and raise my hands straight above my head and open them wide. This pose signifies a tree in Yoga, which once planted, never wanders and provides shelter from the elements. This pose reminds me that I should be like a tree to him, patiently and loyally standing by his side at all times. Ironically I am better at balancing in this pose than my Swami is! Giggles!

• Fidelity

Goes without saying right? Sure, but we both have it in our vows. No cheating or having affairs. We both have agreed that if he wants I will be sexual with other women, provided I feel comfortable with them I have veto power here.  This is a simple pose. I just stand naked, bow my head, place one hand across my breasts and other hand on my vagina. My arms act like a chastity belt and only he has the keys to them
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Doing this daily, really helps me. Not a day goes by without my brain getting the reinforcement it needs that he is my Swami, that I am his Daasi and we have a special bond between us.